...a girl with a history

Wed, 01 Jun 2005 23:05:04 GMT

My birthday was awesome. I got a bunch of money, a sweet new bra that actually fits, and a new yoga ball. yeh. it was neat.

but right now ive just been thinking baout this school year and how much has happened. and even though i want it to be summer so badly, i just dont want to let it all go. a lot of shit has gone down this year and ive been pulled out of alot and still held strong. who knew yearbook signing could be so intense, and touch you so much? im going to go just sit in my room and be a little fag and look at old pictures of this year since i really do have alot.

Wed, 01 Jun 2005 01:52:16 GMT

Its my birthday.

Sun, 22 May 2005 23:33:43 GMT

this weekend was good.
friday- brandon and i went movie
saturday-cpr class with stephy, mat bdon for lunch, we all went to yard sales, i came home, went to greenbriar with elizabth, met kristen for dinner, liz left, me and kris went to the baseball game, we got things from kadena, came home and had a nice girls night.
sunday-buergerking with kris, beach with brandon, met lots of humans there, went surfing, went to eat, i came home, i am her.

im not in a talky mood haha. yeh shut up

Wed, 11 May 2005 02:41:04 GMT

Eh. i guess ill update for the 2 people who read this. I dont feel well right now. Physical therapy is fucking weird. i felt liek i was having a baby. and now i just dont feel well. i have a headache and im really out of it. weird converstaions are also cool. this algebra test ill have to take tomorrow wil be even cooler. almost as cool as my back killing me right now. someone saysomething to make me feel better. kthanks bye.

Sat, 07 May 2005 19:53:48 GMT

Im in a pretty good mood. Yesterday was fantastic. well, almost.
+100 on bio quiz
+my back didnt hurt that bad
+i have a 93 in spanish
-i got a 79 on a spanish quiz
+was allowed to hang out with brandon out of school.
+talked with him about weird things that run through my mind
+got my painting from him finally.
-was interupted by his parents haha.
++++over all a great day and night.

today has been quite sucessful so far. I woke up uber early beucase i had the worst night sleep ever and nightmares. ew. but yeh woke up, ate, talked to the parents for a little while then they went out, and i finished my ID's for history. Yes, all of them. then they broght me home chic-fil-a which will make anyones day great, and then i cut the grass. now im sitting here waiting to figure out what im doing tonight if anything. hopefully something though. i hate doing nothing. Im going to go take a shower.
kbye

Wed, 04 May 2005 21:23:13 GMT

Im crippled and i cant move and i think my spine is desentigrading and tat in a week i wont even be able to walk. school is getting seriosly hard and way to much work. i want to give up so badly but i dont want to take the exams even more. it'll be worth it in the long run.but im going to lay on my heating pad and take a nap. haha

:-( no one comments

Thu, 28 Apr 2005 01:14:15 GMT

i played horse shoes today with 3 random boys. i went to the soccer game that i cant play in beucase of my new back injury. my dad yalled at me and called and a "little shit". this medicine for my back is making me feel odd. I just threw up. im reading a book called "the perks of being a wallflower" its really funny. Im going to belize AND costa rica this summer and that makes me happy. prom plans are weird :-/ oh well its jsut one night and ill get over it. school is a pain in the ass. im doing well though. because i dont want to take alot of exams. now im going to go get some apple juice.
bye

Tue, 19 Apr 2005 01:57:54 GMT

well yeh. shit happens. and it gets worked out if its meant to be worked out. and it was thank god. this weekend was cool. today was pretty good dispite the fight. yahhhh this weekend beach with katie i think. that should be sweet. i wont get to see my baby though... my goal is to keep my grades up and be happy alot more. becuase smiling is fun :)

unbreakable like nothing could go wrong.

Fri, 15 Apr 2005 02:27:10 GMT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

LEIGH ANNE!!!!!

yay. we won our game today. thats it.

BEAUTIFUL SUNDAY!

Sun, 10 Apr 2005 21:48:28 GMT

Jenna and i played hide and seek today with 7 year olds. no need to say more :-)

Wed, 06 Apr 2005 23:30:43 GMT

Well, today was good kinda. It was warm, and that always makes my day 110% better. Brandon wasnt there so i didnt have anyone who wanted to talk to me. :-( soccer was hot but we got out at 4 30... so kristen and i went and got some fooooood at chicfila and then we got ice cream! and went to the lacrosse game to cheer on katie and leighanne... buit then i left. hahaa. yeh thats it.

now im folding clothes.... bye.

Tue, 05 Apr 2005 01:22:27 GMT

-I dont feel well. :-(

-Soccer sucked since molly and kristen wernt there :-(

-got a 71 on my history test :-(

+i got a check for 56 dollers in the mail :-)

- i have like 50 notecards to do for english and i havent started

+ spring is coming

yeh im in a really bad mood right now. blah i just want to go sit in a corner. Today was a FAILED day.

thats its. bye.

Mon, 04 Apr 2005 00:13:24 GMT

today i went to the movies with brandonoo. We saw guess who. it was cute. yeh laaa.... not much kis going on . im not tired and its like 8. poop.

- Current Clothes: grey sweatpants, grey sweatshrit, and thick socks... im cold!
- Current Mood: Bored. i wanna hug.
- Current Music: none
- Current Taste: gum
- Current Make-up: mascara .
- Current Hair: up and messy
- Current Smell: humm... i don tknow.. laundry.
- Current thing I ought to be doing: eating.
- Current Desktop Picture: the beach
- Current Favorite Artist: yeh
- Current Favorite Group: to many.
- Current Book: gossipgirl-2
- Current CD in CD Player: mix.
- Current tape in VCR: we dont have one
- Current Color Of Toenails: pink
- Current Refreshment: none
- Current Worry: im not good at living.

LAST PERSON...
- You Touched: brandon
- You Talked to: mommy

- You Hugged: brandon?.
- You Instant messaged: leigh anne
- You Yelled At: daddy
- You Kissed: brandon..again ha .

FAVORITE...
- Foods: chickeni guess. chink food.
- Drink: diet pepsi
- Color: red, green, pink, royal blue, bright yellow, purple, orange, yeh all of them..
- Album: couldn't tell you.
- Shoes: birkies
- Candy: neccos!.
- Animal: something small
- TV Show: degrassi
- Movie: all of the good ones

- Song: lua by bright eyes
- Vegetable: carrotts
- Fruit: mango!
- Cartoon: eh

ARE YOU...
- Understanding: try to be
- Open-minded: yah
- Arrogant: eh
- Insecure: very
- Interesting: to some people
- Random: oh yeh
- Hungry: of course.
- Friendly: to some
- Smart: no way

- Moody: way to much
- Childish: you bet
- Independent: yeh.
- Hard working: if i like it.
- Organized: it the things i wanna be organized in.
- Healthy: sometimes
- Emotionally Stable: not really
- Shy: to some.
- Difficult: yeah .
- Attractive: ew no
- Bored Easily: depends who im with or what i have to do
- Messy: phhh yeh!.
- Thirsty: yes.
- Responsible: yeh.
- Obsessed: no... well only in a good way.
- Angry: no.
- Sad: yes
- Happy: when iwith someone
- Hyper: depends
- Trusting: i def try to be

- Talkative: yehhhhh sorta
- Legal: no

WHO DO YOU WANT TO...
- Kill: alot ofpeople
- Slap: Mr. davis.
- Get Really Wasted With: my mom.
- Get High With: my sister
- Tickle: my dad. is that weird?
- Look Like: someone incredibly good looking for sure
- Talk To Offline: my lover
- Talk To Online: whoever wants to talk to me

I am in love with SPRING!

Sat, 02 Apr 2005 23:39:56 GMT

yay spring. i loved today even though it was rainy. haha the leaves are coming out! yes!

last night was super fun. really. i went to brandons and ate with his parents then we got in the hot tub which i really want one, then we watched a movie with his parents and brother. it was good.

then today i went shopping. got a bunch of earings and some makeup. and a book. yeh i like to read. now im pondering on what to do tonight. thats it. p.s. im hungry.

.cat

Thu, 31 Mar 2005 23:57:21 GMT

so taday went like this

+half day of classes b/c of the play
-had the worst cramps of my life
-got a 76 on my alg quiz
+finished my term papaer resources
+didnt have to practice becaouse of my cramps
-i had to sit for 2 hours during the play when i felt like i was going to vomit.
-i wanted to cry all day
+ got a job at ceder point
- i have to study now.
+5 months today! <3

yep thats it... so over all an allright day i think. 5 bads and 5 goods. even out i think. haha

bye

Sun, 27 Mar 2005 22:55:22 GMT

Yo. well not much to say. i dont really like easter. i wish i liked holidays. but i dont considering we dont celebrate them. yeh. so slept till about 1 30 today and then ate alot and watched tv all day. my sister left and she took my clothes with her. i hate that. but yeh thats about it. i think im gettinig sick. blah. goodbye

Sun, 27 Mar 2005 04:33:43 GMT

Im sorry that i lied. Im a peice of shit for doing it. I hope that this wont be as serious as i feel llike it is. im scared to be honest

Sat, 26 Mar 2005 03:50:32 GMT

hey hye. last ngiht went tio brandons and ate some pizza. today i went to the mall with my sister. then with brandon. then we went to matts house. yeh. neat. then came here and watched tv. yeee. thats baout it. anyone up to chill tomorrow?

How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boggie in it!!!

Fri, 25 Mar 2005 19:57:30 GMT

:x: name = Catherine

:x: piercings = ears

:x: tattoos = no

:x: height= five eight.
:x: shoe size = 8-81/2
:x: hair color = blonde
:x: siblings = sister-elizabeth

LAST...
:x: movie you rented = hillz. haha
:x: movie you bought = dont really buy movies
:x: song you listened to = rod stewart - here i go again
:x: song that was stuck in your head = since youve been gone.
:x: cd you bought = atreyu

:x: cd you listened to = kelly clarkson with my sister
:x: person you've called = brandon?
:x: person that's called you = kadena
:x: tv show you've watched = degressi
:x: person you were thinking of = god

DO...
:x: you have a crush on someone = no
:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = eh.. sometimes
:x: you think about suicide = have berfore

:x: you believe in online dating = no way.
:x: others find you attractive = i dont know why they would
:x: you want more piercings = maybe like another on my ear, not into the whole peircings
:x: you like cleaning = no, i like baths
:x: you like roller coasters = yes
:x: you write in cursive or print = sloppy print

FOR OR AGAINST...
:x: long distance relationships = depends on what the ralationship was before they left
:x: using someone = no way
:x: suicide = no the best idea
:x: killing people = against
:x: driving drunk =against
:x: gay/lesbian relationships = defini,lty for, even though im not.
:x: soap operas = haha nah.

HAVE YOU...
:x: ever cried over a girl= yeah probably to many.
:x: ever cried over a boy = way to many times

:x: ever lied to someone =yes
:x: ever been in a fist fight = no.
:x: ever been arrested = close

WHAT...
:x: shampoo do you use = herbal essence
:x: shoes do you wear = uggs, vans slip ons, birkenstocks, flip flops, new balances
:x: are you scared of = dying

NUMBER...
:x: of times I have been in love? = two or three

:x: of times I have had my heart broken? = once
:x: of hearts I have broken? =dont know
:x: of girls I have kissed? = sad.
:x: of boys I have kissed? = 8
:x: of girls I've slept with? =depends what you mean slept with. ive fallen asleep with many
:x: of boys I've slept with? = one
:x: of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends? i dont nkow. one.
:x: of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? = three or four or five
:x: of scars on my body? = way to many

favorite:
5 letter word: candy
actor/actress: nah
Candy: necco hearts.
Cartoon: rocco
Cereal: lucky charms.
Chewing gum: orbit pink.
Color(s): purple, black, white, green
Color nail polish: dont wear nail polis

Day of week: friday
Least fave day: monday
Flower: all of them.. hibiscus
Jello flavor: watermelon

Jewelry: hemp and neat earings
ents: huh

mer/Winter: summer
Trampolines or swimming pools: swimming pools
Smell: cliniqure happy

ast.. ||

Slept in your bed: me
Saw you cry: Brandon last night.
Made you cry: my dad..bc of things.
You went to the movies with: brand
Yelled at you: msgach
Sent you an email: livejournal informing me of new comments

|| Have you ever.. ||

Said "I love you" and meant it?: yes
Gone out in public in your pajamas: pjama day at school
Kept a secret from everyone: yes
Cried during a movie: yea
Ever at anytime owned new kids on the block stuff: no
Planned your week based on the TV Guide: yes.....
Been on stage: yah
Been to New York: yes
Been to California: no
Hawaii: no
Spain: no
China: no
Canada: no
Europe: no
Asia: no
South America: close
tralia: no
Wished you were the opposite sex: sometimes.
What time is it now?: 2 46
Apples or bananas?: bana!
Blue or red?: red
Walmart or target?: target
Spring or Fall?: spring
What are you gonna do after you finish this?: prbably go to the mall
hat was the last meal you ate?: chicfila
High school or college?: college
Are you bored?: yes
Last noise you heard?: tv
Last smell you sniffed?: my daddys faty
time you went out of state? eh.

Ever Been Called...

Dumb? yeh
Retarded?: yes
Ugly?: yes
Hot?: yes
Fat?: yes allthe time
Anorexic?: yes
A waste of space?: yes
Useless?: yes
Slut?: yes
Beautiful?: yes
Smart?:yes
Quiet?: yea
Boring?: yess
A Bitch?: yes
Rebel?: yeh
Conceited?: yes

Currently

What are you wearing?: jeans, sicks, pinkjacket
Who are you talking to?: LA
ow is the weather?: cloudy&ew
What are you listening to?: nothign
What/Who are you thinking about?: what im doing tonight
What are you looking forward to?: summer
What are you dreading?: school
How are you feeling?: grey
How is your hair?:its nice
What are you annoyed by?: my cat.

Emotions

What emotion do you feel the most?: sad
What emotion is the best?: happy
Worst?: death
What hurts you the most?: death.
Who makes you happy?: anyone whos nice
Depressed?: when im lonely
Are you a really emotional person?: yeah
What do you do when you're depressed?: cry
What song do you think was written about your life?:all of them

When Was The Last Time You..

Burped?: lasterday
Cried?: last night
Went out to eat?: this afternoon
Got dumped?: about 6 months ago
Dumped someone?: last year in feb
Threw up?: recently
Went skating?: rolelr skating!!!
Went for a walk?: i dont have legs
Ate ice cream?: neevr
Got into a fight?: whenevr that time was with kadenaor many jenna.

Issues

Do you do drugs?: yeh
Do you have a mental disability/illness?: no
Are you on any medication for any type of disorder?: no
What kind?: i said no
Do you or have you ever had an eating disorder?: ...
What kinds of illnesses run in your family?: cancer and heart problems

[Personal]
Who is your role model:
What are some of your pet peeves: .
Have you ever liked someone you had no chance with: yeah
Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: no
Want someone you don't have right now: nope
Pierce your nose or tongue?: nahh
Be serious or be funny?: funny
Do you have a crush?: no

Tue, 22 Mar 2005 02:45:48 GMT

Im sketched out about this ordeal. It will most likely back fire, but im doing nothignabout it until it does.

Sun, 20 Mar 2005 22:55:29 GMT

really bad news.

SATURDAY

Sat, 19 Mar 2005 15:42:11 GMT

well. yesterday i got my report card. 4 C's, 1 B, 1 A. yeh sucks. atleast no d's. Then soccer prac. was weird. she made us crawl down the feild and hit the ball with our head.

Then me and kristen and katie and LA watched some of the lacrosse game, dropped katie and la off then went to kristens where we jsut hung out for a while. Then picked "the girls" hahahaha back up and went to mc hammers. Hung out there for a while.

Then we all went to nickj.'s. we went in a scary house.
that was creepy. We stayed the night out there, thank god Brandon was there so i could sleep somehwere. haha.

Woke up. La got sick. haha then went to chickfila with bob and bdon.

Had a job interview. that went well i think.

Hopefully tongiht im going to see the ring 2 with brandon. i hope its good. yeh.

bye

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 00:56:03 GMT

I look at you and my anger rages like an ocean,
A vast sea of wasted feeling,
And precious time.

Hurt by the things you say and do to me,
And the things you dont think i hear,
Or you dont think ill find out.

They always find their way back to me.
And the gaps and oceans
Between us grow wider and vaster and deeper.

As words get between us until
Neither of us know what to say,
And nothing is left to do but to turn around,
And look the other way.

Teliing lies
To let the other one know who's not hurt the most
When really all it does is tear me up inside.

I want to talk,
To try to work things out and
Repair the rift that keeps growing.
But words get in the way.
We get angrier and more frustrated.

But how do i explain
How i feel and how much i want
To whister between classes,
And go on double dates,
And share clothes and eat ice cream and giggle.
Spend the night making fish faces until we laugh so hard out sides split,
And do all the things that used to be important,
But are now forbidden
Because one of us might let our guard down
And say or do somthign that will make the other angry.

But somehow as i sit here and write this,
Not because i want to but because i have to for you and for myself,
The rift seems to heal itself and the ocean doesn't seem quite so bottomless.
And im smiling again.
Because i know you will read this,
And understant it and me, and the way i feel.

Because you always have and i know you always wil.
Its that bond that reaches oevr oceans and repairs torn hearts,
Something that only a best friend can understand.

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 00:53:06 GMT

soo ya. um friday courtney came over for a while and we watched a movie. interesting movie. saturday.. blake and i went to lunch... then brandon came over for a little while, then jay picked me up with leighanne and daniel and we went somewhere. not sure where. then back to her house. katie came over. i got a shot glass and a lighter stuck in the pool table. yes only i could do that. sunday brandon picked me up at LA's and we went to get ice cream the lunch hahah dessert before the meal. then back tomy house hung out for a little while then went to a movie then to mattf;s. i was mad... but got over it. he came over for a while then went home.. i slept. school monday was horrible. bad grades on my examinations. the soccer practice kinda sucked but was better today since kristen was there haha.

Today was kinda bad though and i dont know why. i just feel like talking to someone about it but i dont really have any like super close frinds that i can do just that with. yeh. thats about it.

bye

Fri, 11 Mar 2005 23:19:18 GMT

So im sitting here. Ive called people today and asked peopel to do stuff. But im the last resort for most. Not saying it in a mean way it just sucks. I try and try with sme people, but i guess they are taking advantage of sweet revenge and tryign to get back at me for soemhtign that should be over with. I know what i said was dumb, but this is rediculous.

..... mixed emotions right now. No one probably understands that. Oh effing well. Maybe ill go to the mall with Courtney if Heather doesnt call her. yeh...bye